Quotable Quotes

See the sigfile

With apologies to Reader's Digest. This page has no intentional resemblance or connection to the Reader's Digest. No copyright infringement intended. I do not guarantee the accuracy of these quotes. I don't guarantee anything.

Star Trek

Kirk's monologue: Space: The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. It's five year mission: To explore strange new worlds... To seek out new life, and new civilizations... To Boldly Go Where No Man Has Gone Before.

Picard's monologue: Space: The Final Frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. It's continuing mission: To explore strange new worlds... To seek out new life, and new civilizations... To Boldly Go Where No One Has Gone Before.

Dr. Leonard McCoy:
"He's dead, Jim"
"I'm a doctor, not a _______"

"Live long and prosper"

"Resistance is futile!"

"Make it so!"

Star Wars

Yoda: "Do, or do not. There is no try."

"I will not fight you"
"This is your last chance, Jabba. Free us, or die"

Vader: "Asteroids do not concern me"

Obi-Wan Kenobi:
"Use the Force, Luke"
"Mos Eisley... a wretched hive of scum and villainy..."
"That's no moon... that's a space station."

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

The Guide: "Please feel free to blither now."

Marvin the paranoid android: "Here I am, brain the size of a planet..."

"2001: A Space Odyssey" and sequels

"Good morning, Dr. Chandra. I am ready for my first lesson today"
"There is a message for you"
"I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave"
" I am completely operational and all my circuits are functioning perfectly."

David Bowman (through HAL): "All these worlds are yours, except Europa. Attempt no landings there."

William Shakespeare

On his tombstone:
Good friend, for Jesus' sake forbear
To dig the dust enclosed here
Blessed be he that spares these stones
Cursed be he that moves my bones

Hamlet: (in Hamlet)
"To be, or not to be!
That is the question."

Mark Antony: (in Julius Caesar)
Friends, Romans, countrymen!
Lend me your ears.
I come to bury Caesar
Not to praise him.
The evil that men do lives after them
The good is oft interred with their bones.
So let it be with Caesar"

Julius Caesar: (in Julius Caesar) "Et tu, Brute? Then Caesar must fall"

Real people

Bill Gates (or so I've heard): "640k ought to be enough for everybody"

Sectoid Ortado (some guy on IRC):
"Love, life, and blueberry sectoids"

Neil Armstrong:
(or Edwin Aldrin?) "Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed"
"That's one small step for [a] man, one giant leap for mankind"

Satya: (me)
"If at first you don't succeed, make sure you screw up properly"
"If it's working, something's wrong"
"The net is safer than most people think and also more dangerous than most people think"

HowlCCC: "Life is never too busy not to extend the hand of friendship and help to another"


The Jargon File:
Das Internet is nicht fuer gefingerclicken und giffengrabben. Ist easy droppenpacket der routers und overloaden der backbone mit der spammen und der me-tooen. Ist nicht fuer gewerken bei das dumpkopfen. Das mausklicken sichtseeren keepen das bandwit-spewin hans in das pockets muss; relaxen und watchen das cursorblinken.

Robert A. Heinlein (as seen in various sigs): A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

The Mask: (The Mask)
"Somebody stop me!"

Bugs Bunny: (you have to hear him!)
"You were expecting maybe the Easter Bunny?" (Space Jam)
"What's up, doc?"
"Pardon me, doc..."
"So long, screwy, see you in St. Louis!"

Elmer Fudd: "He-ey! There's something awfuwy scwewy going on awound here!"

Howard Paine (Dennis Hopper) in Speed:
"Very, very, exciting, Jack. Some close calls, huh?"
"Do not attempt to grow a brain!"

John Travolta in Broken Arrow: "Would you mind not shooting at the thermonuclear weapons??"

Rahul (Shah Rukh Khan) in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai:
(roughly)Hum ek baar jeete hain, ek baar marte hai, shaadi bhi ek baar hoti hai, aur pyaar bhi ek baar. (We are born once in lifetime, we die once, we marry once, and we fall in love once.)

"And what was it you discussed while we were cut off?"
"Mutiny. We decided against it."
-- Hindmost and Louis Wu in Larry Niven's The Ringworld Engineers

The point of the pointer points to the point at which the point of the pointer points.
-- Satya, several years ago.

My shredder burps like a Sarlac after eating Boba Fett
it's never too early for frikkin' insanity!